Tatlong Gabi, si David Fincher, at ang epekto ng Domino

          Noong isang gabi, nag-aayos ako ng mga damit. Nagtabi ako ng ilan, ibinalot sa plastik, atsaka gamit ang pentelpen, ay isinulat ko sa plastik ang label na "Lordei at Charley." Andami ko na kasing damit. Maliban sa nagpapanibagong-hubog din ako (naks), ay hindi na rin kasi praktikal ang magtago ng damit na sa sobrang dami ay kaya kong huwag umulit ng outfit buong taon. Nakakahiya man aminin, ay totoo ito. Hindi naman ako mabili. Nagkataon lang talagang masagana ang Nanay ko sa mga kagamitan, at kapag 'di na kasya sa kanya o kaya'y pinagsawaan na, ay ipinaaampon na niya ang mga ito sa akin.

          "Ayusin mo nga posture mo," madalas kong sabihin kay Lordei. Medyo kuba kasi talaga siya, e matangkad pa naman din, maganda, at tila pang-model ang katawan. Payat pero 'yung eleganteng payat. Hindi ko naman ibinabandera ang "slim" na pangangatawan, ngunit mukhang natural kasi ito sa katauhan ni Lordei. Malalaki rin ang kanyang mga mata, at mas lalong lumalaki 'pag nakakakita ng ipis, 'pag napapatili dahil nakatanggap ng practical joke na teks mula sa ilang pilyong mga kaibigan, o kaya'y 'pag nae-eskandalo ng simpleng akbay/kiss/panlalandi ng iba. Madaling maapektuhan si Lordei. Pero ayon nga sa isa ring malapit niyang kaibigan, ay "talagang hindi matatawaran ang kanyang katatagan."

          

          Hinimok ko siyang mag-ayos. Malaki kasi talaga ang potensyal ni 'Te na maging "classy," pero parang nasanay na lang siya sa mga ginupit-gupit niyang t-shirt, ginupit-gupit niyang shorts, at simpleng pares ng tsinelas. Sabi ko naman, nakatutulong kasi ang pag-aayos minsan sa pagma-"masswork." Sumang-ayon naman siya. Tinanggap niya ang mga damit na ibinigay ko dati pa. Minsan ay nagpalagay pa siya ng makeup sa kanyang mga kabahay. Pero ang hindi ko nasabi sa kanya, ay kahit ano pa ang ayos niya, magara man ang damit at may makeup man o wala, nananatili siyang maganda sa mata ng masang kanyang pinagsisilbihan.

          Kagabi, hinihintay ko ang utol ko nang magteks siyang hindi raw siya makakauwi agad dahil magdadala siya ng mga gamit kay Lordei, tapos sabay teks naman si Absie ng, "Ingat ka." Mula roon, ay nalaman ko na sa mga sumunod na mensaheng nasa ospital nga ang dalaga. Nanakawan daw. May injuries. 'Yun lang. Nang makausap ko na si utol kalaunan, saka lang naipaliwanag sa akin kung ano ang nangyari.*

          Bandang alas-tres ng hapon ay may lalaking tumungo sa University Student Council office upang magtanong kung pwede pa mag-setup ng booth sa nalalapit na UP Fair. Naroon sina Lordei at Shai, nag-uusap. Tumulong sila kay kuya at ibinigay sa kanya ang contact number ng isang USC officer. Noong nalaman ni kuyang wala na raw bakante sa fair, umalis na siya. May kinailangan sigurong puntahan si Shai, kaya't siya ay nagpaalam muna. Maya-maya, pumasok na ang ilang mga lalaki (kasama 'yung nag-inquire kani-kanina lang). Sabay lock ng pinto. Mabilis daw ang mga pangyayari. Paalis na ang mga kalalakihan sa Vinzons Hall sakay ng isang taksi nang mapansin ng sekyu na kumakaripas sila. Saka siya pumito. Matapang ang drayber ng taksi. Preno agad matapos ang pito. Naaresto ang isa, samantalang nakatakas ang iba. Nakatira raw ng droga ang nahuling suspek. Nabawi rin ang mga ninakaw na laptop, telepono, at iba pa. Sa ikalawang palapag ng nasabing gusali, sa loob ng opisina ng USC, nandoon ang katawan ni Lordei--walang-malay at kritikal ang mga dagok sa ulo. Sabi ng doktor at ilang mga saksi, pinukpok daw siya ng tubo sa ulo. Idinala si Lordei sa UP Infirmary bago inilipat sa Capitol Medical Center. Hanggang ngayon, ay nasa Intensive Care Unit pa rin siya ng ospital. Wala pa ring malay. Kailangan daw niyang pumailalim sa isang operasyon upang maiwasang dumiretso ang mga pira-pirasong bahagi ng kanyang bungo sa utak.

          Habang pinapakinggan ko ang salaysay na ito, hindi ko maiwasang mapamura nang ilang beses. "Alas-tres ng hapon...maliwanag...hindi gabi.... Ni-lock sa kwartong mag-isa...kritikal sa ICU." Naisip ko kung ano ang ginagawa ko sa hapong yaon. Naisip ko rin kung ano ang mga pinagkakaabalahan ng ilang mga kaibigan at kasama sa paaralan nang mga panahong 'yun--malamang may nagru-room-to-room bilang bahagi ng kampanya para sa mas de-kalidad at mas abot-kayang edukasyon, siguro may ilang nagmi-meeting o tumatambay sa unang palapag mism ng Vinzons, baka may nagmu-movie marathon sa kanilang mga bahay-bahay, o nagfe-Facebook, o nagna-9gag. Naisip ko kung sa panahong 'yun ay nagge-Gameboy si Noynoy, o minamaneho ang kanyang puting Porsche, o nagbibigay ng talumpati sa kung saang opening ng isang Jollibee branch, puno ng mga pangako, mga imahen ng isang maliwanag na bukas at isang partikular na "landas" na hindi ko na sasabihin kung anong itsura at saan patungo dahil nakakasawa na. Naisip ko ang eksena sa hapong yun mula sa mahaba-habang Coronavela, kung saan ang mga senador at ilang matutunog na pangalan sa loob ng isang malaking bulwagan ay nagtatalastasan kung dapat nga bang ikonsider na makatarungan ang pagpapahiram ng pera ng isang family corporation kahit pa ito'y dissolved na. Naisip ko kung ano ang tumakbo sa isipan ng gwardya, ng taksi drayber, ng bangag na lalaking nahuli, at ng mga nakatakas. Gaano ba kahirap ang mga kinakaharap nilang krisis? Marami ba silang anak? May mga kabit at bastardo kaya silang kailangang pakainin? Anu-ano kaya ang mga pangarap nila sa buhay?

          Hindi ko maiwasan. Sa mga ganitong pangyayari ay umiikot ang aking utak ala-David Fincher, at pinagtatagpi-tagpi ang mga buhay-buhay ng sangkatauhan sa loob lamang ng ilang mga minuto. Dahil sa loob ng mga minutong iyon ay nakakulong si Lordei sa loob ng isang kwarto, pinagtulungan ng ilang sabog na kalalakihan, at pinagpupupukpok nang walang habag. Ini-imagine kong kaya rin sukdulan ang pagpahirap sa kanya, ay dahil nagtititili siya at pilit lumalaban. Nagpupumiglas.  At ngayon, kahit wala siyang malay at naghihikahos, gumagana pa rin ang kanyang puso. Ang tatag.  Tipikal iyon kay Lordei. Tipikal iyon para sa kung sinong alam ang kanyang mga karapatan at pinipiling ipaglaban ang mga ito.

          Ngayon, nagdarasal ang iba. Ang iba naman ay nagpo-post ng kung anu-anong narsisistikong links sa Facebook--mga halimbawa ng itinanim na false, almost fantasy-like "simulacrum," ayon na rin sa paliwanag ni Ser Roland Tolentino ukol sa postmodernism. Samantala, ang iba naman ay walang kaalam-alam sa nangyari. Para sa ilan, si Lordei ay dapat tulungan, dasalan, bantayan sa ospital. At dapat lang na ipatuloy ang laban para sa dagdag-badyet ng maintenance and other operations expenditures (MOOE) ng Unibersidad ng Pilipinas. Para naman sa iba, si Lordei ay isa lamang sa primetime news headlines. 'Di ba't mapapamura ka lang talaga? Maiinis ka rin sa mga hipster na kunwari, "tibak," para may kabuluhan lang ang mga buhay at basta lang kumontra sa mainstream, ngunit hanggang online posts lang ang kaya, hanggang existentialist lang na mga pagtatanto at pagra-rationalize. Maa-agit ka rin sa kawalan ng resulta sa laban para sa isang siyentipiko, makabayan, at makamasang edukasyon. Kaya lang naman nag-layoff ng sandamakmak na security guards ang UP dahil nagko-cost cut upang saluhin ang bilyun-bilyong pisong kinakailangang badyet para sa MOOE na hindi naman ibinigay dahil sa ngayon, ay dapat lang na "self-sufficient" 'di umano ang nasabing Pambansang Unibersidad. Ang galing at pogi talaga ng ating pangulo.

          Hindi ito imbento. Lumilitaw na ang mga produkto ng pagbabalewala sa pag-aaral ng kabataang Pilipino. Ikaw man si Lordei, o anak ng simpleng mangingisdang pasado sa UPCAT ngunit 'di nakapag-enroll dahil sa P100 000-matrikula kada semestre, o estudyante ng UP na nanganganib na ma-extend dahil kailangang magtrabaho upang mag-ipon para sa isyu-shoot na film thesis, o simpleng aktibistang estudyanteng pinili ang ganoong buhay dahil mismong mga kundisyon na rin ang nag-udyok upang bumalikwas, ito ay totoo: Nakamamatay ang pagpapabaya ng estado.

          Ngayong gabi, tutungo ako sa aking kaibigan. Sana ay swertehin at mayakap ko man lang siya nang mahigpit. Kinabukasan, itutuloy ko ang kanyang laban at ng marami pang maalam at nakikialam na mga tunay na Iskolar ng Bayan.

*Ang mga ito ay isinalaysay lamang sa manunulat. Maaaring mabago ang ilang mga detalye kapag nagkamalay ulit si Lordei at mailinaw ang ilang mga bagay.  

Lordei, isang maulang araw sa komyu

The Lola Within a Material(ist) Girl: Of Recognizers, Isomorphic Algorithms, and the good ol' Light Cycle match

I've always known that there's a hidden nerd in me.  I spent the afternoon watching the original Tron (1982) on cable TV.  I saw the sequel, Tron: Legacy (2010)--shot and released almost three decades later--in the cinema, and I couldn't help but admire the animation efforts in the classic 1982 sci-fi flick.  I swear I endured worse-looking sci-fi films in the 90s and beyond (e. g. Johnny Mnemonic, Battlefield Earth).  The writing and the plot weren't that impressive, though, which almost always goes for all Hollywood sci-fi titles.  I don't get how Yori (Cindy Morgan) kisses Tron (Bruce Boxleitner), and then kisses Kevin Flynn (Jeff Bridges), too, just because "they thought [Tron] was dead"--and actually gets away with that reason when Tron and she finally share a final smooch before the film ends--I mean, how could she?  Maybe programs aren't programmed to be faithful.  Anyways, Tron was a good enough watch:

I just don't know about one of the important characters, Dumont, looking this way.  You have to agree with me, it does resemble *something* right??

Here's the "Tron pose"...

...as replicated in the 2010 sequel.

Yori, despite cheating on Tron, was a real beauty.

Played by Cindy Morgan, it was a bit sad not to see her again in Tron: Legacy.

Bruce Boxleitner gave life to a total dreamboat, Alan Bradley...

...and Tron, himself. *sighs*

Boxleitner reprises his role in 2010, looking not so bad at all.  Not at all.

There are some new faces in Tron: Legacy.  I happen to like House's "Thirteen" (Olivia) looking so badass in her Karen O. haircut.  I also find Quorra's character totally lovable.

Quorra (while showing Sam her book collection): But between you and me, Jules Verne is my favorite. Do you know Jules Verne?
Sam: Sure.
Quorra: What's he like?  

English cutie, Michael Sheen, whom I love, love, love in Underworld: Rise of the Lycans and Unthinkable... 

...also gives us quite an interesting club owner by the name of Zuse, inspired by Ziggy Stardust.

The things I like most about about Tron, though, inspite of the appalling writing and plot, is how original some visual concepts are.  Tron: Legacy brings back and modernizes some familiar stuff like the Recognizers, Light Cycle matches, and even introduces new species of programs who might actually possess something like the human DNA, the Isomorphic Algorithms (ISOs), Quorra being the last one of them.  All in all, the Tron franchise does not disappoint as the Star Wars.  But I have yet to encounter more sci-fi stories and movies that are well-explained to the audience, not to mention, decently written (e. g. The Inception, Children of Men) and are as visually impressive as the two Tron films, so far.  Of course, I'm not talking about The Matrix sequels.  I just can't stand Keanu's cardboard acting.  No matter how cute he is, uh-uh:

*happy*

 *angry*

*sad*

 *scared*

Ang Tunay na Magnanakaw ay Wala sa mga Dyipni at Eskinita ng Maynila

Isang araw, nabutas ang paborito kong boho bag (na ginagamit ko simula pa noong freshman pa lang ako). 


Nakasakay ako noon sa Ikot jeep, at napag-isip-isipan kong hindi siya simpleng butas lang.


Nilaslasan ako ng bag ng aking katabi. Buti na lang at naunahan ko, naramdaman ko bago may makuha.





Sabi ko sa katabi kong lalaking may malaking knapsack, "Wala po kayong makukuha sa'kin kasi wala naman akong pera. Ang akin lang, karamihan ng dala ko ay hiram lang (i.e. kamera at tripod ni Kenny). Hindi lang po pera kailangan n'yo, alam n'yo 'yun." Tapos, bumaba na lang ako ng sasakyan.


Sa huli't huli, ang mga lumpen ay sintomas pa rin ng isang mala-kolonyal at mala-pyudal na lipunan.




At sa isang lipunang gaya ng atin, mayroong mas makapangyarihang mga magnanakaw na mas dapat pag-ingatan at litisin ng bayan.  Sila at ang sistemang kanilang pinatatakbo ang nagluwal ng mga karaniwang magnanakaw.


Sila ang naglaslas ng paborito kong boho bag.

The Lola Within a Material(ist) Girl: In love with Combats in a Warfreak Kind o' Way

"One day, these boots...

...are gonna walk all over you."

(a message to our current "horrible boss," Noynoy Aquino, his landowning clan, cronies, and his master, the Imperialist US)

We're comin' atcha: My germano and me on the second day of UP (SILIP) STRIKES BACK. Photo by Charley dela Peña.

To Those Who Missed the Making of History

If anyone attacks us and if the conditions are favorable for battle, we will certainly act in self-defense to wipe him out resolutely, thoroughly, wholly and completely (we do not strike rashly, but when we do strike, we must win). We must never be cowed by the bluster of reactionaries.

- Mao Zedong on the Kuomintang fight   

I was late. On the 23rd of September this year, I have to admit, I did not go to UP Diliman at the pre-arranged calltime. The previous night's "Walastik! Repapips, Dehins sa Cuts" concert/vigil ended at around one in the morning, plus I've always had problems with waking up early since the day I was born (I probably came out later than expected, too), so my stupid body clock was just not going to do me any favors. Waking up at 7 a.m., the calltime, itself, sent me to a "shower shortcut" (a few splashes here and there), a breakfast of Prest-O and Choc-O amidst my "F**k-Oh's" while running towards an Ikot jeep, and a guilty discovery of what looked like hundreds of students already geared for the day's drill: UP STRIKES BACK's Third Day--The Tsunami Walk that was supposed to literally rock the gates of Malacañang.

Then again, when one commits a mistake, one simply corrects it as quickly as possible. So I ran to and from colleges, together with rows of genuine "Iskolar ng Bayan/Alagad ng Media" from the College of Mass Communication. It was exhilarating to be able to stage a snake rally and penetrate the walls of the College of Music and shout out messages such as "Edukasyon, edukasyon! Karapatan ng mamamayan!" along its corridors in the midst of its usually undisturbed melodies. Joining the rest of the UP Diliman contingent in front of Palma Hall was an altogether different story, however. "Exhilarating" is a term that does no justice. At first, the number of students, faculty, and employees did not seem so big, but as the long march began, as it proceeded along Philcoa, it suddenly dawned on me that we would, indeed, be flooding Mendiola.

And I was not wrong. After an estimated 10-kilometer walk from Diliman to Mendiola, I witnessed one of the most mindblowing scenes in my life, so far: joined by the contingents from other state colleges and universities, our combined numbers barely filled the Don Chino Roces Bridge. "Parang Mayo Uno lang!" I thought to myself. At this point, the bridge was filled with various and yet solid chants that were so loud that it was impossible to converse with anybody audibly. If Butch Abad claimed that there was no budget cut at all, he had to be seriously mistaken. If PNoy declared us his "boss," he was a total prick for lying. 8 000 people from academic institutions leaving their respective buildings (or lack thereof), has got to reiterate one glaring truth: We refuse to take a step farther on the Tuwid na Daan. It is now clear what this straight, yellow brick road entails: foreign interests before those of the Filipino people, 100% privatization of social services (one of the provisions in PNoy's proposed Charter Change--the fastest and quietest bill that is in progress in the House of Representatives), and all other neoliberal policies that will do Uncle Sam proud.

Further proving its anti-people stance, the current administration spits in the face of the youth when Deputy Presidential Spokesperson Abigail Valte says, "Focus on your studies," addressing the tens of thousands of students who went on a nationwide strike last week. How the hell can I focus on our studies when I have a friend who works extra hours to pay her overdue 2008 student loan? When my brother's tuition fees range from P20-25 000/semester while I was able to finish most of my units at P300 each? When my orgmate's bandmate was granted Bracket E1 (free tuition) by the UP Diliman's Socialized Tuition and Financial Assistance Program (STFAP)--"an income generating program," as former UP President Emerlinda Roman would refer to it, as-a-matter-of-factly--but was also, recently, barred from enrolling because of his unpaid student loans? Now, this is only a single yellow brick, for I have found it impossible to "focus on my studies" eversince the Ayala-initiated and National Housing Authority(NHA)-implemented QC-CBD project and other plans designed by business oligarchies have been sending hundreds of thousands of homeless families to hellish places such as Montalban, Rizal along faultlines with no eletricity or water, because, apparently, the cities are better off filled by condominiums, parks, malls, and all that cosmopolitan jazz rather than actual residences. The book, Philippine Social Realities, which was published decades ago, may get republished and rewritten, but the reality that "seven out of ten Filipino farmers remain landless" still remain an unchanged reality up to this day. Yes, Miss Valte, it is only right that we focus on our studies, if only your boss--because it is now quite obvious that we are, in fact, not PNoy's "boss"--focuses on our education. If only this administration focuses more on what its constituents need in order to rightfully call themselves citizens of a democratic society, rather than kissing foreign, imperialist asses.

The world is alit with the flame of protest: The 100 000 students leaving their classrooms and heading to the streets of Chile, the thousands who have been occupying Wall Street, the tens of thousands who declared a National Strike in the Philippines. These and other symptoms of an oppressed society will eventually ripen the conditions for what Mao Zedong once described as "self-defense." Indeed, the state must be afraid of its people, and not the other way around. Because the times call for more militant actions than lighting candles against budget cuts, or claiming responsibility for convening progressive alliances that oppose budget cuts but whose presence is merely felt in photo opportunities, Facebook posts, and a few meter-stroll as their so-called "involvement" in last Friday's Tsunami Walk. Yes, UP ALYANSA, I am talking to you. Go fix yourselves, and do something genuinely "para sa bayan." Your opportunism only worsens the crises that beset the common Filipino.

And given these times, we, the people who set forth this movement calling for a freer nation, will always give our solid response. We will deliver numbers and results, because we are the decisive forces. We will rock the gates of Malacañang, and shake the status quo, because we believe that we deserve our democratic rights, far more than the 20 richest Filipinos deserve their daily dose of Häagen-Dazs ice cream, far more than Obama's wife deserves her uber-stylish wardrobe, far more than the Imperialist powers deserve their automatic licenses to enslave and kill. 

To those who were not able to reach their maximum militancy during the Nationwide Strikes, the struggle did not end there. With the fingers of my right hand crossed and my left fist clenched upward, I hope that, when the next opportunity for you to join the fight for our rights presents itself, you will leave the confines of your classroom or the comforts of your bedroom. I hope that your voice will be heard along with the others' as we fill the streets with our chants, our speeches, and our songs. And for myself, I hope that I start the next days an early, incredibly angry bird.

UP STRIKES BACK Day One. Photo by UP SILIP

Photo by Aiess Alonso 

The Tsunami Walk Begins. Photo taken by UP Aperture on 23 September 2011

Plank for the People. Photo by UP Aperture

Photo by Aiess Alonso

Ang guro ng Bayan, Ngayon ay Lumalaban! Photo by UP Aperture

Photo by Aiess Alonso

A UP Professor and Nationalist fraternity members raise the people's morale by waving flags and laying out banners on every footbridge there was, while tens of thousands of students, faculty, and employees marched to Mendiola. Photo by Aiess Alonso

Student leaders take an oath in Mendiola as the conclusion of STRIKE's Tsunami Walk. Photo by UP SILIP

The March Home. Photo by UP SILIP

The Lola Within a Material(ist) Girl: Hacked and Bee-stung Today

I just saw Hackers (1995) this afternoon. Found the film quite atrocious, but sat through it because 1) I never "not finish" a film, no matter how bad, unless it's High School Musical; and 2) I must say, Angie was lookin' gooooooood back then. I mean she's still incredibly attractive now, but Kate Libby's was the best look I've seen her don. It's everything I want to do with my hair and clothes but can't, because if I get a pixie 'do, I might end up looking like a soccer mom (since I don't have naturally straight hair), while androgynous getups aren't exactly flattering on bumps and curves. Kate kicks ass for me anytime. Forget Lara Croft.

Sharing a scene with real-life ex-husband, Jonny Lee Miller, who played hacker genius, Dade murphy

Damn, those lips. I remember kissing her on a magazine cover when I was, what, eight? Gross? I don't think so. Kissed a girl and pretty much liked it. 

Gearing Up as UP STRIKES BACK in 2011

After shooting "Mitsa," a short film by UP Sining at Lipunan (SILIP) that portrays the effects of the budget cuts in education and other social services 

After shooting "Mitsa," a short film by UP Sining at Lipunan (SILIP) that portrays the effects of the budget cuts in education and other social services

After shooting "Mitsa," a short film by UP Sining at Lipunan (SILIP) that portrays the effects of the budget cuts in education and other social services

Breaktime: Angry Birds

Students, faculty, workers, and the administration staff of the University of the Philippines - Diliman partake in a Unity March on 14 September 2011 to protest against the budget cuts in education and other social services. Predominantly in black. 

"UP, STRIKE BACK!" - UP Sunken Garden

Students wear band-aid inspired props.

A student show his love for current UP President Alfredo Pascual. Pascual has been a staunch supporter of the fight for greater education subsidy and is one of the most progressive pro-student UP president in history--especially after replacing the former president, Emerlinda Roman, whose regime approved the UP Charter and the 2006 Tuition and Other Fees Increase (TOFI) among other repressive school policies.

When there's no other way out, look to your left.

High school students also join in the fight. This is, after all, mostly for them: the future Iskolar ng Bayan.

Photos by the UP Sining at Lipunan (UP SILIP)